Undercover Downunder
In deepest December, 5 intrepid tourists head south to Sydney, via Kuala Lumpur, Adelaide and Melbourne, with just three ambitions: to enjoy the warmer climes of Australia; to taste some fine Aussie wines; and most importantly to watch the greatest English cricketing fight-back of all time, as Freddie inspires his boys to come from 2-0 down and retain the Ashes………
Day 1-3 Awaiting News
Kuala Lumpur – Finnegan’s Irish Pub
Deep in thoughts over pints of Guinness whilst the rain hammers at the window, the sound of a mobile breaks though the silence. Slowly I pick it up and answer it before turning to my fellow travellers: “I’m sorry” I say, “ It’s over – the Ashes are gone – they’ve beaten us in Perth.”
The guys sigh deeply before one of them downs his Guinness and comments “and we’re not even in Australia yet.”
Day 4–10 - Into Hiding
Somewhere between Adelaide and Melbourne
Suddenly the third ambition loses its lustre and the emphasis switches very much to the 2nd. The 5 now wine enthusiasts head for the Hills or the Vale (McLaren Vale that is) and take refuge among the vineyards from the onslaught of Aussie ribbing, whilst drinking themselves into oblivion!
Day 11 – Braving the Weather and the MCG
Boxing Day – 1st day of the Melbourne Test and someone called Shane Warne’s 700th wicket (photo above)
As the wind batters the city and the temperatures drop below double figures, we head off to the MCG in an assortment of shorts, T-Shirts, sunglasses and thongs (the shoe variety), refusing to believe it’s the coldest Christmas on record in Melbourne! Despite the weather – it’s wet, overcast and bloody freezing – 90,000 people pack into the MCG, we drink ice-cold beer, and Flintoff wins the toss and for some reason doesn’t bowl! Still, the noise made mainly by the rampant Barmy Army is deafening. It’s quite an experience being there and if you’re an Aussie it’s even better, as Australia bowl England out for 159 and we are all treated to a guy called Shane Warne getting his 700th wicket! For the English, we’re all secretly pleased when finally the rain comes (that stuff that’s been missing in Adelaide, Brisbane and Perth) and the day draws to a close.
Day 12-13 – Enduring the Test Match
MCG
It’s not good. After raising hopes when Australia are reduced to 84 for 5, England don’t get another look in. Australia cruise to a crushing victory inside three days, but the Barmy Army are still in form and at least the temperatures have risen to just above the 10 degrees mark.
Day 14-15 – Enjoying the Culture and the Sunshine
Various establishments in Melbourne
At least with no cricket, there’s plenty of time to visit museums, animal parks and the rest of the Melbourne tourist sites…. or alternatively sit in a pub (sorry bar) and burn in the glorious sunshine that has finally found its way to Australia.
Day 15 – Two Get Stuck in the Bathroom
Apartment Block - Sydney
Oh dear what can the matter be?
Sam and John get stuck in the lavatory
Not for the faint-hearted - Full story on request.
Day 16 – New Years Eve
Somewhere in Sydney
Somehow miss the fireworks drowning sorrows and writing a complaint letter to the ECB.
Day 17-20 – Witness the First Whitewash in 85 years
New Years Day – Final test - SCG
It starts so well, the sun is out, the seats are fantastic and the SCG – a somewhat friendlier village style of a stadium, reminiscent of those happy go-lucky summer days on Parkers Piece, is alive with friendly rivalry and the voice of the Fanatics in yellow and the Barmy Army in red! And even the cricket on this first day is probably the best we’ve seen from England for a while as England finish on 234-4.
In deepest December, 5 intrepid tourists head south to Sydney, via Kuala Lumpur, Adelaide and Melbourne, with just three ambitions: to enjoy the warmer climes of Australia; to taste some fine Aussie wines; and most importantly to watch the greatest English cricketing fight-back of all time, as Freddie inspires his boys to come from 2-0 down and retain the Ashes………
Day 1-3 Awaiting News
Kuala Lumpur – Finnegan’s Irish Pub
Deep in thoughts over pints of Guinness whilst the rain hammers at the window, the sound of a mobile breaks though the silence. Slowly I pick it up and answer it before turning to my fellow travellers: “I’m sorry” I say, “ It’s over – the Ashes are gone – they’ve beaten us in Perth.”
The guys sigh deeply before one of them downs his Guinness and comments “and we’re not even in Australia yet.”
Day 4–10 - Into Hiding
Somewhere between Adelaide and Melbourne
Suddenly the third ambition loses its lustre and the emphasis switches very much to the 2nd. The 5 now wine enthusiasts head for the Hills or the Vale (McLaren Vale that is) and take refuge among the vineyards from the onslaught of Aussie ribbing, whilst drinking themselves into oblivion!
Day 11 – Braving the Weather and the MCG
Boxing Day – 1st day of the Melbourne Test and someone called Shane Warne’s 700th wicket (photo above)
As the wind batters the city and the temperatures drop below double figures, we head off to the MCG in an assortment of shorts, T-Shirts, sunglasses and thongs (the shoe variety), refusing to believe it’s the coldest Christmas on record in Melbourne! Despite the weather – it’s wet, overcast and bloody freezing – 90,000 people pack into the MCG, we drink ice-cold beer, and Flintoff wins the toss and for some reason doesn’t bowl! Still, the noise made mainly by the rampant Barmy Army is deafening. It’s quite an experience being there and if you’re an Aussie it’s even better, as Australia bowl England out for 159 and we are all treated to a guy called Shane Warne getting his 700th wicket! For the English, we’re all secretly pleased when finally the rain comes (that stuff that’s been missing in Adelaide, Brisbane and Perth) and the day draws to a close.
Day 12-13 – Enduring the Test Match
MCG
It’s not good. After raising hopes when Australia are reduced to 84 for 5, England don’t get another look in. Australia cruise to a crushing victory inside three days, but the Barmy Army are still in form and at least the temperatures have risen to just above the 10 degrees mark.
Day 14-15 – Enjoying the Culture and the Sunshine
Various establishments in Melbourne
At least with no cricket, there’s plenty of time to visit museums, animal parks and the rest of the Melbourne tourist sites…. or alternatively sit in a pub (sorry bar) and burn in the glorious sunshine that has finally found its way to Australia.
Day 15 – Two Get Stuck in the Bathroom
Apartment Block - Sydney
Oh dear what can the matter be?
Sam and John get stuck in the lavatory
Not for the faint-hearted - Full story on request.
Day 16 – New Years Eve
Somewhere in Sydney
Somehow miss the fireworks drowning sorrows and writing a complaint letter to the ECB.
Day 17-20 – Witness the First Whitewash in 85 years
New Years Day – Final test - SCG
It starts so well, the sun is out, the seats are fantastic and the SCG – a somewhat friendlier village style of a stadium, reminiscent of those happy go-lucky summer days on Parkers Piece, is alive with friendly rivalry and the voice of the Fanatics in yellow and the Barmy Army in red! And even the cricket on this first day is probably the best we’ve seen from England for a while as England finish on 234-4.
Alas it doesn’t last and we are praying for rain again which strangely doesn’t arrive when you want it. England collapse on the 2nd day with the loss of six wickets for just 45 runs! It only gets worse on the 3rd with Shane Warne demonstrating why he shouldn’t be retiring and it’s all over on the 4th – England lose 5-0 and we end up in the pub yet again sipping inferior Aussie beer (at least England are good at something) and raising our glasses to what we know will be a crushing England win in 2009!
Sam
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