Drama at Lords Today to Rival the Oval Yesterday

There were no accusations from the umpires of ball tampering or tantrums at tea from Hayes Hurricanes but I am sure they are feeling as gutted as the Pakistan Cricket team tonight.

The day started well for Cambridge Papworth Ladies XI. We won the toss, elected to bat and the 12th man was not needed to sub for any no-shows. (Phew! Time to relax and enjoy it.) The wicket was rather soft and the outfield greasy but we skipped around in our warm-up. (Well, I skipped around; everyone else was jogging and looking professional. I was also the only idiot not wearing spikes, which is where exuberant skipping nearly cost me a broken neck. I really must get some proper gear if I am to be any good at this cricket thing.)

It was a little disappointing to lose Hannah Smith our Captain, with the score at only 24 runs off 7 overs. However, as Kath Morgan, our number three arrived at the crease to join Caroline Ingarfield, the heavens opened and stair rods rained down. After 20 minutes the Lords nursery ground was covered in puddles. The umpires announced a pitch inspection at 2pm but the rumour was that the groundsmen weren’t keen. Apparently Pakistan would be practicing there next week (all except Inzy maybe) and they didn’t want us messing up their wicket. Sure enough the game was abandoned and a deep discussion ensued between the team captains and management. Well we didn’t have a manager but HH did. And he was adamant they could not replay on Bank Holiday Monday at Cambridge as we had offered. So it was to be decided on a Bowlout!

The Bowlout comprised a penalty shoot out between 5 bowlers from each team, each having two balls to hit the wicket. We did consider a protest at this stage and nearly refused to leave the changing room to eat the free lunch provided. No-one had indoor bowling shoes. (All wearing those silly spikes of course!) But the tomato and mozzarella foccacia sandwiches were too tempting so we scoffed our lunch and headed into the indoor nets to practice before mustering at 2pm for the shoot out.

HH went first.
Their first bowler bowled 2 balls. She missed both.
Our first bowler, Daisy bowled 2 balls. DIRECT HIT BOTH TIMES. TWO NIL!
Their second bowler bowled 2 balls. She missed both.
Our second bowler, Sally, stepped up. She missed both.
Their third bowler bowled 2 balls. She missed both.
Our third bowler, Hannah, bowled 2 balls. She missed both. STILL TWO NIL!
Their fourth bowler stepped up. She bowled 2 balls and scored with one. Aaaaaaaaaaaaagh! TWO ONE TO PAPWORTH!
Our fourth bowler Paula bowled 2 balls. (Surely Knibbsy, former England player, can’t miss?) She did – both of them – by a coat of varnish.
Their final bowler bowled two balls. DIRECT HITS BOTH OF THEM!
Nooooooooooooooooooooo! THREE TWO TO HH!
CUMONKATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kath bowled the 2 final balls. She scored with ONE. THREE ALL!!
Pheeeeeeuwwww!
We moved onto “Sudden Death”. (I got sudden indigestion.)

HH bowl and miss. Phew!
Daisy bowls and misses. Darn it!
HH bowl and miss. Pheeeeeeeeuw!
Paula bowls and misses. Oh Lordeee Lordeeeee!
HH bowl and miss. I need air!
Kath bowls AND HITS THE STUMPS INTO OBLIVION!!!!!!!!!
YAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! WE WON!

So off to Taunton – The Home of Women’s Cricket (?!!) to play a mystery side from Up North in the final of The Lady Taverners National Knockout Tournament.

If you fancy a coach trip to Taunton for a tenner, book a date in your diary for Sat 2nd September. Who knows my spikeless trainers may yet again get to play a starring role in a Bowlout and you could be there to see them.

Owzat?

If you want to leave a comment click on the comment button just under these words.